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I Bought a Shark!

July 25, 2022 by Lazy Man Leave a Comment

Who is excited about Shark Week?!?!

Shark Week

I never understood the excitement of Shark Week. Where were all the people getting excited about Giraffe Week last month? It looks like Discovery retired Sloth Week as there hasn’t been one for several years. That’s a week that this Lazy Man can get behind.

Well, this year, I decided to go all in. If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. I bought a shark a couple of weeks ago. Did you know that you can buy a pet shark? Since I’m still new at this, I thought I’d refer you to this guide to pet shark ownership. It covers the basics better than I could

As the guide points out, depending on the shark, you are going to need a good size tank. It has a minimum of 180 gallons recommendation. It can go all the way up to 10,000 gallons. For the minimum, you need a tank about 8 feet long. My shark is a baby* and I only bought this 150 gallon tank. That’s poor planning. I will probably have to upgrade once Mr. Chompers gets to full size. At $1,800, the tank wasn’t cheap.

You are also going to need salt water. While salt isn’t too expensive, it’s getting more costly thanks to Putinflation. Mr. Chompers needs to eat. He likes to eat other fish, which will eat the money out of your wallet. Even though I can often find a deal on tilapia at Aldi, it still is not very cheap. Plus, just like puppies, baby sharks eat a lot.

Tomorrow, I’ll dig a little deeper into my shark purchase. In the interest of full disclosure, the Amazon link above is an affiliate link. If you plan on buying a super expensive potential shark tank, Amazon will give me a few dollars. Also, this article, like all my shark articles this week, will be satirical.

* Baby shark, do do do-do-do-do.

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